Stop Following Me.

It Follows (2014)

Directed by David Robert Mitchell

I'm already a super paranoid person. I always plan for the worst and I always worry people are following me for no reason. I know it's irrational and it makes my life harder than it has to be. Tell that to my weirdo brain. I can't just turn it off. I know, I try all the time. So yeah, this movie doesn't help me. It feels personal. Maybe that's why I find it so good and scary.

So what if there was curse that was passed on with sex. Sure you already have to worry about being awkward or feeling inadequate, STDs, getting preggers and now this? You get fucked by some fucker who already got curse fucked and death comes after you. But it doesn't just happen quickly. Some creepy old lady starts shuffling after you. Or some creepy little kid. Or a creepy clown with smeared makeup and no shoes. And if they catch you, they destroy you. That is the story in It follows. 

So the next time you about to get laid you need to make sure they aren't death curse fucking you. Look them in the eye and say "Do you have a death curse. Are you trying to fuck away your death curse on me?" and see how they react. If they seem awkward or weird just get get up and run.